Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand, Six Hundred Minutes

What a year! I am in a totally different place at the end of this year than I was last year at this time. It is amazing what a little time can do. It’s amazing how time can move, flow, and continue to transform us and carry us along.

This year is over and tomorrow starts a new one. As I reflect on this past year, I am reminded of the Broadway song used for my title. How do you really measure a year? How do you measure its effect on the life of each one of us?

Is it measured in daylights; in sunsets; in midnights; in cups of coffee?
Is it measured in inches; in miles; in laughter; in strife?
How do you measure a year of life?

Tomorrow starts a new year. You will have 525,600 minutes of life. You will have 525,600 journeys to try and plan. What will you do? How will you measure the success of your next year of life?

Remember that love is a gift from up above. Share love; give love. Measure you life in love. Measure your life in Seasons of Love.

The writer’s of this song were thinking of a human love when they wrote it. They were thinking of the love shared between two people. This song could be so much more powerful if we took it to mean the type of loved expressed in scripture- Godly love.

Give someone love this year- real genuine love. Give Godly love: The love that gives without hope of return; the love that wants more for others than self; the love that is patient and kind.

Getting past me, my own problems and my own situations, and putting others first would be genuine love. We will only experience the fullness of God’s promise when we began to show true love. Lord- help me most!

I do not endorse in any form or fashion the production RENT

The Twelfth Day of Christmas

It came.

The gift I celebrate on this twelfth day of Christmas is the gift of knowing what Christmas is really all about. So many people know that we celebrate this season because of the birth of our savior- Jesus. We often say that, 'Jesus is the reason for the season.' That is true... sort of... but not really.

You see as I type here tonight in these few minutes past midnight- my mind and heart all mixed up with emotions from one extreme to another- I am the reason for Christmas. Me. This day isn't so much about Him as it is about me. He came for me. He loved me so much... so deeply... he came for me. I am the reason for Christmas.

"(21)And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins. (22)Now all this was done, that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by the prophet, saying, (23)Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us."
Matthew 1: KJV

He didn't just come for me- He came for you, too! He came for all of us. Christmas is about you as much as it is about me. The reason for Christmas is even wrapped up in the dirtiest, filthiest vagabond who slept in the street last night. It is about all of us... and today I am thankful that I know this powerful and humble truth. We are the reason for Christmas.

Peace to all of you! Goodwill to whoever you are and wherever you live! Jesus has come! He came for you... He came for me. Merry Christmas!

The Eleventh Day of Christmas

Mercy: The very idea that God is willing to consider His death the same as ours so that we may live a life free from the punishment of sin given that we have put our faith in His sacrifice and acted accordingly.

Grace: God's favor and His gift of power and strength to do what is right in all circumstances.

These two thoughts were actually on my mind yesterday- however, since yesterday was... well, you know- so I thought I would write about them today.

What list could be complete without the mention of God's grace and mercy? Not any list I could come up with. When I say that, I mean that more in the sense that these two things could not be overlooked simply because this is my list- and if anyone has ever come close to 'breaking the bank' of Grace and Mercy- it is me.

Last Sunday night one of our new converts stood in front of the crowd and talked about how she was going to give Jesus her praise and worship this year. Right in the middle of her speaking the Holy Ghost swept into the sanctuary. Our pastor's wife, Sis. Holley, began to sing the song 'My Alabaster Box' (I think that is what it is called). The presence of the Lord was so wonderful as he accepted their gifts.

I am sure that beautiful new convert might look at someone like me and wonder, 'How much Grace and Mercy have you used... I mean, really?" Yet, I have had an entire lifetime to know where the mark is and continually miss it! The thing is- you don't know.

You don't know what roads I have traveled in my life. You don't know how it is possible that I am here today. No one knows- no one but Jesus and I. Yet in the end our oil is all very similar- it cost Him His life.

Today, on this eleventh day of Christmas, I choose to celebrate the gift of Mercy and Grace. The gift that I have yet to wear out- and never want too!

God is good- no matter what, He IS good... and not just on days where His mercy and grace are in the front of my mind- He IS good ALL the time!

The Eleven... umm... wait a sec?

Well... it looks like I was off and didn't even know it. In my defense... none of my readers caught it either. Yesterday (still today for me because I still have not gone to bed)- Tuesday, December 23- is the TENTH day of Christmas. How did I ever get off? O well... it wouldn't be 'my' blog if I wasn't off somewhere! lol

Tomorrow- Wednesday- will be the Eleventh Day of Christmas... which will make Thursday- the 25- the Twelfth Day of Christmas. Imagine that... I was off. I have no idea how! lol

So... no thought for tonight. (This is hard work... and I ain't gonna give one up for free!) lol

The Tenth Day of Christmas

the final lap begins...

Today Jason called to chat and at the last moment- right before he ended the call- he told me how today while he was working he realized that this year would be the first time ever that he and I will not be exchanging Christmas Eve gifts as has been our tradition since we can remember.

I had not even thought about it. But it is true. This year will be the first time that he and I will not be together on Christmas Eve. I cried. I couldn't help it- even though I desperately tried. Then I got upset. I called him back and told him he was a jerk for reminding me of such things right before hanging up. We laughed.

Holidays are not easy times for people who have lost loved ones who are very dear. My heart goes out to those who will be celebrating Christmas for the first time without someone they love this year. I ache for them... and the gift I celebrate today is not just for me... it is for everyone!

The gift of the unseen future. Wow.

So often we think of the future as 'uncertain'- not just 'unseen.' It is both. Why would something unseen be such a wonderful gift? Think about it.

Unseen things leave room for hope. They leave room for dreams. Unseen things leave room for ones heart to sore on the wind of possibility. That is where my heart is- flying high in the winds of what might be.

Right now our Christmas is small. Our family is small. We are strong- but battered. Is everything bad? Not at all.

As a whole, us here and Jason and Julie, are doing our best to enjoy each new year, making our own new traditions while finding strength in the old ones we still have. We have a renewed sense of enjoyment for every moment because you never know what life will bring. So why the forward glance?

In spite of our outlook there are still difficult moments- especially around holidays. So I catch myself dreaming of what might be in the unseen future. My heart takes flight on the hope that someday our Christmas will not be so small. One day it will be full again with laughter and joy. I dream... and when I do, I dream big. No one knows my dreams but me. They are the hope and expectation of my family's tomorrow.

To someone who has never been in my situation, I am afraid you might believe me to be someone who is living for the future and not the here and now. This is not the case at all. I simply find myself strengthened by the knowledge that better days are to come.

To anyone who finds themselves in a desperate situation this year; to anyone who is doing everything possible to keep their mind and heart busy; to anyone who is praying and hoping they don't have some sort of a mental break down on Christmas day... you have a gift this year. The gift of the 'unseen' future ahead. Allow hope to paint it to be the most beautiful picture you can dream.

The Ninth Day of Christmas

Several months ago, in August to be exact, I took my Samsung swimming. Needless to say, it didn't take well to the idea. I spent about a month debating within myself before I broke down and purchased the iphone. I LOVE IT!

In fact, this small device has so revolutionized my life that my brother confessed yesterday to actually calling the headquarters of the Apple merchandising store in California to see if they made Apple Christmas ornaments. They do not. He had intended to purchase one for me to commemorate the year of my iphone purchase.

Anyway... yesterday I found my old power cord for the Samsung. I decided to try it out and it worked! I was able to get all my old numbers from the phone. I was so happy. I have spent the last thirty minutes getting information from one source to another.

All of this brings me to the gift I celebrate today. The gift of being able to live in the 20 & 21 century. Many may consider this a curse... but I do not by any means. I am a product of my time.

In winter I walk over the box on my wall and adjust the temperature of my home. It gets set to the exact temperature I prefer (usually 70). In summer I walk over to the same magical box on my wall and adjust the temperature to the exact temperature I prefer. No fires, no uncomfortable clothing, no giant fans waving all over the place... just wonderful technology doing its job. I wonder what someone like George Washington would think about a thing like Central Heat and Air?

Whenever I dirty a dish I simply rinse it, open the dish washer, and slide it in. When the washer is full, I turn it on and let it do all the work for me. Wonderful. There are so many other wonderful things I could talk about.

I could talk about the computer that I am typing on. Wow. I wonder what people from other time periods would think about the whole concept of a computer? A way to stay in constant communication with the entire world. Or, I could even discuss my iphone!

My iphone is quickly becoming my 'one' device. It has neat games, my calendar, constant weather updates, gps maps that tell me exactly where I am and were I need to go, a camera, a notepad, calculators, my Bible- in any translation I want, my mobile newspaper from anywhere in the world, my walkman (now we call them ipods), my e-mail, movie rental store, unlimited web service... you name it... it has it. Amazing.

I couldn't even imagine living in another time period. I detest camping for the very reason that if 'frees' me of needed technological conveniences- like sanitary restrooms! I am not someone who idealises the past. SO, on this ninth day of Christmas, I am thankful for living in the modern era. Thank you, Jesus that even my Kleenex can now be sanitized with those little blue dots in between the plies!

The Eighth Day of Christmas

I have just finished picking up my house from a Progressive Christmas Party. This year, I was the last house- the desert house. Kassie and I teamed up to make some very good stuff! I am whipped... and am about to go to bed.

Today I am thankful for the gift of each friend that I have. It is similar to another day, but not really. They say that most people live their entire life and can only count the number of true friends they have on one hand. I can honestly say that I would need at least both of my hands for such a task.

Each of my friends has made me a better person. They each bring different perspectives and unique qualities to my life- they enrich me.

"Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." Proverbs 27:17

I am so thankful for godly friends who inspire and challenge me just by being who they are. Through the years- especially the last few- they have given me the courage, strength, and determination to continue on. I am blessed.

Friends- they help make life worth it!

The Seventh Day of Christmas

Today was the last day of school before Christmas break- Thank you, Jesus! I really need a break... and the kids REALLY, REALLY, REALLY need a break.

At work, I primarily work with students who have special needs- dyslexic, autism, learning disabled- and today one of my autistic kids was sent to my room before school even started because he just would not SHUT-UP! He was SOO excited. He was talking so much he was making himself out of breath.

I didn't worry too much because if he passed out then he would at least have to stop talking. I also didn't tell him to be quiet because it is CHRISTMAS TIME! Isn't everyone excited? They should be.

This Sunday our x-treme Music Director, Sis. CeeDee (an orange-skinned purple-haired puppet), is staring in a puppet Christmas play. Our kids are very excited... in fact, I caught one of them laying on the floor in hallway trying to peek in through the return vent to see what it was all about! I am sure that when Sunday comes along they will be high as kites... it will be so much fun.

In light of these things, on this seventh day of Christmas, today I am thankful for a special gift that I will credit- in part- to my family- and in part- to God. God gave me a gift to be able to work in His kingdom and to use for His glory. My parents nurtured it. My brother had to constantly experience it growing up. lol

I am so thankful that I get to wake up every morning and go to work doing what I enjoy the most... helping someone experience life! Then, as if that isn't enough, I am blessed to be able to do the same thing at church... help someone experience life living for Jesus! I am blessed.

I don't ever want to take what I do lightly. I never want to stop feeling the need to drive toward perfection in what I do. I also never want to forget that anyone else could do what I do, and I am blessed to be the one doing it... even if it is the last day of the semester, before Christmas break, and with a student who truly sometimes cannot make himself shut-up!

The Sixth Day of Christmas

I knew that at some point on my list would be Jason- today is the day. Jason, my brother, is a gift to me- one of my greatest. After going back and looking, I have written no less than two posts about him per year for each year of my blog... so I know you must tire of it! I am sure he does.

O, well.

I don't ever want to lose the thankfulness for being given a sibling. There is nothing like them. I have said it before and I will say it again today: You cannot possibly understand the scripture reference, 'closer than a brother'- unless you have one.

And since they now are one, in the same breath I must now say that I am so very thankful for his wonderful wife, Julie. It is a gift that my sister-in-law still allows me to be so close with my brother- her husband. Some might say that it is odd I thank her for such a thing. I disagree.

Julie will never know how much I admire her for her selflessness. I am sure that she sometimes feels she might not be as selfless as I think- but she would be wrong. She entered our family at a turbulent time and never complained. So many young brides would have been so much more demanding and wanting more attention on them.

I remember the day of the wedding. I was totally committed to the entire day being about her and her marriage to my brother- I would have done anything necessary to help make it so. For several weeks, and even months leading up to it, it wasn't all about them. She never complained and never seemed to begrudge our family or our circumstances.

Now that I have typed it out... it kinda sounds like Julie is the gift! That's okay... she is a gift... and not just to my brother. She was a gift to our family.

On this sixth day of Christmas I am thankful for the gift of my brother and his godly wife. I love you both! (and since you will both probably see this... you know... Christmas is always so much more fun with kids... humm...)

The Fifth Day of Christmas

Friendship. At first, I thought I would just go with friends, and maybe later I will- they certainly deserve a day all alone- not today.

As I thought today about a gift that has been given to me I couldn’t help but think of the way my parents taught my brother and I to ‘be friends’ with others. My family was never very wealthy and my parents never really had a whole lot to give in the way of ‘things.’ They did give of their loyalty, kindness, compassion, and love. In doing so, they taught my brother and I to do the same.

I can remember going ‘shopping’ in our closet for toys- and they could not be old or broken- that a family in the church could use since the father had been laid off work and the kids were only going to get one gift that year. We gave some of our nicest away- wrapped and ready to go.

I had tears in my eyes today as I recalled a time we went to visit a family friend while on vacation. My parents had heard that they were facing hard times and our visit was to help them out. I remember that we showed up right around dinner time. We were graciously invited to eat and my parents insisted they make a trip to the grocery store to buy a few ‘extra’ items for the meal. My parents filled the house with at least six grocery bags of food and when we left that evening everyone was crying. I was young and although I don’t remember a whole lot- I remember knowing my parents had done something wonderful for that family.

I cannot count the number of times we have accompanied my parents on grocery runs for other families. Nor can I count the number of times we wrapped gifts and dropped them off at someone’s house. My brother and I were almost always allowed to be involved. I don’t really know if we were ever given a reason- it was just something that needed to be done and so we did it.

I wish I could tell you how many people they helped with acts of kindness… I certainly know quit a few by name… but to say would somehow cheapen their gift… so I will just simply say that it is far too many to count- and that is completely true.

My father was a friend to anyone. He knew every family on the block on a first name basis. My mother was a little different. She seemed to have a wall- but not really- once you were inside- and just about anyone could get there- she was just as friendly and fiercely loyal. The crowds at their home going services were testaments to their friendships- just as the letter I received yesterday from one of their close friends still trying to somehow pay them back for years of kindness.

So today I am thankful for the gift of knowing what friendship really means. It means you allow yourself to give to others without ever expecting them to pay you back or return the favor. It means your door is always open and there is always an extra seat at the table. Those things are easy to say- but really meaning them is a different story.

I have many friends. Some closer than others. All too often I do not tell them how much they mean to me and how much I love them. I want to be a better friend; someone who really is an example of how friendship should work. I had such a wonderful example growing up. If I could take anything from my parents… any trait that I want to posses in a double portion… I want to be able to be a true friend. I have much work to do.

The Fourth Day of Christmas

When I first started teaching I did not attend any after school events. Whenever someone would talk about the parties or a 'get-together' they would mention how drunk someone became or how someone did such-n-such... it just didn't seem like the place I wanted to be.

Then one year, something happened. One year I decided to help plan our staff Christmas Party and the result was drastically different.

Where once there was an event where only a few participated- with drinking and rowdiness- there was suddenly an event where there was laughing, games, and fun without people needing to get drunk... and anyone who did get something to drink seemed almost out of place. Suddenly our staff parties were fun for everyone.

As long as I worked at my last school, I was always asked to be part of the party planning.

I owe this to the gift of laughter. Why? Because laughter is the outpouring of joyfulness. There is an old chorus that talks about all the things God could have put into our soul, but He chose laughter.

Just think about it for a minute. The ability to laugh. The ability to find joy in the most ordinary and mundane things. So many people in our world do not have joy. I think that is why our staff parties where such a success when I helped plan them. Not because I am something special, but because suddenly there was genuine laughter- not some drunken induced state of unawareness.

I look back through my own life and there are so many times when I was able to laugh and I shouldn't have been able to do so. So many times God has allowed me to 'release' through laughter and then everything suddenly seems a little better.

As I was growing up our home was filled with laughter. If we didn't laugh at ourselves then someone else would! Laughing at yourself was a very important lesson indeed... one both my parents took the liberty in helping to teach. Every family needs to have laughter; inside jokes; funny stories; funny glances with hidden meanings; all of these make life so much 'funner'!

Thank you, Jesus, for the gift of laughter!

The Third Day of Christmas

The first 'gift' was completely spiritual, the second- well, sorta, and the third... well... it is certainly important enough to mention!

I keep on my iphone (I found its first flaw today- you must take your gloves off in 20 degree weather to use the touch screen- they need to fix that) the current temperature for Wichita Falls, Ft. Worth, San Antonio, and Rochester, New York. I do this because all of my family lives in one of these four places... because, believe it or not, all except for our small Texas off-shoot, all live relatively close to one another.

Today in Wichita Falls the temperature stayed below 32 all day. In Rochester it hovered near 50 around late noon. I mention this because even though they were shockingly warmer than us all day, I never once wished to trade anyone places.

So... today I reflect on the gift of my Texas birth. If these gifts are about things that have had a great importance in my life then this one surely has. Early in the month of February I was born in a small north Texas town- thank you Jesus!

To a lot of people in the United States this means nothing; however, to Texans it means everything. This gift brings about a multitude of joys: the knowledge of good food; the ability to strike up a conversation about the weather with someone I don't know; the joy of living in a conservative state; knowing the social rules of leaving a crowded parking lot; and knowing how to make a delicious glass of 'sun tea.'

I have visited New York, as well as many other states, and I am so happy I live in a place where even at Christmas we are still a little slower than most. Even the long lines in Texas are so much happier than in other places. It is just a wonderful place to be.

We may not have very much snow or any of that 'white Christmas' stuff they sing about- which is perfectly fine with me because I HATE winter and cold weather anyway- but there is no other place I would rather call 'home.'

The Second Day of Christmas

I was tempted to go in some sort of order; however, if I did I knew I would get it all wrong. So, today’s gift has nothing to do with yesterday’s gift, nor is its place in the list any indication as to its significance.

Today I will reflect on the gift of ‘memories’. Like yesterday’s gift this one seems to have no true tangible manifestation but its worth is impossible to calculate.

I also feel I must clarify just what I mean. I am not actually talking about the memories themselves- which are a part of this gift and just as priceless- but I am thinking a little larger. My gift of memories would be the knowledge of how important they are, the ability to create my own, and the desire to see others experience memories of their own.

This, of course, is another gift that comes directly from my parents. I can still close my eyes and remember trading out the sour cream for cottage cheese while my Dad left the table, when he returned he inattentively loaded his burrito with cottage cheese, which he detested. It isn’t possible that I was over six years old and yet I still remember that my brother and I could hardly suppress our giggles.

I will never forget the birthday where my Mother dressed up and served our dinner in courses- I got to drink from ‘gold’ (really brass) goblets. Later she would tell me she had tried to make it as special as possible because I really wasn’t getting anything in the way of gifts, and money was tight. Gifts or not, I have no recollection of anything other than our meal.

At thirty years old I cannot put a pillow into its case without thinking about my grandmother and the day she taught me how to do it. The memory is strong enough that I can smell her house and fell her hands on mine as she smiled and made it into a game. Just yesterday when I took my bedding out of the dryer and began slipping my pillows into their cases I thought of her again.

Last night the Life Tabernacle kids when caroling and handed out cookies to elder members of our church. I did not feel very well (something seems to be trying to start- I have rebuked it and am currently consuming mass amounts of O.J.) but in spite of myself I couldn’t help but feel complete as we finished our caroling. I have so many memories of doing things in church when I was very young. Now it’s as if my life could be no other way. I pray everything we do for our children get’s deposited somewhere if for no other purpose than that they may say they were ‘raised around the church.’

Don’t be afraid to do something different this year. Make a memory, start a tradition, have banana splits for dinner on Christmas Eve. Do the unexpected… live a memory.

The First Day of Christmas

I missed our Thanksgiving service this year at Life Tabernacle. Our pastor, Rev. Gene Holley, Jr. asked the church to thank someone as part of that holiday. I completely missed the boat (not that difficult for me to do, actually). So, in a nod to his request, I have decided to do something different this year for Christmas. Something that is just as much for me as anyone else.

Today, for anyone who cares, starts the ‘twelve days of Christmas.’ This year, I am going to find twelve gifts that have been given to me in my life that have had the greatest impact; twelve things that I am blessed with. It is my gift to me- and you get to enjoy it, too.

I could start with nothing better than this; the church. It might seem a tad cliché, but it simply must be the first thing on my list. Why? Because ‘the church’- the true church that I have been raised in- has been the gateway to providing a steady diet of truth, which in turn led to so many other powerful things.

Since the passing of my parents, I have often wondered if they actually understood what they were doing as they raised me in a biblically based church. I know that above all their goal must have been that my brother and I make it Heaven. I would imagine that would be any parent’s goal or the goal of anyone who reaches for another soul.

Being that my parents were converted to truth, I wonder if they ever thought of any other reason for raising us in church? I wonder if they thought that perhaps there would come a time when we would face uncertainty: our life would be turned completely upside down, except for the fact that it was grounded in truth and somehow never really capsized like it seemed it would?

I wonder if they ever imagined they might not always be around and maybe they thought that a day might come when we would feel alone- alone and empty- except we could never really be too alone because there was a supernatural fellowship with a body of Christ that fulfilled needs so deeply that it would be difficult to describe.

I doubt they ever thought about too many of these things… that doesn’t stop me from wondering if they did.

I wish more people thought about what they were really giving their children when raising them in the body of Christ. It might make them a little more willing to press on and believe in the worth of the fight.

I am afraid too many parents take for granted what they have the opportunity to give their children if they will stay committed, faithful, and vigilant concerning being in the body of Christ. It is so much more than just attending a church. It’s about helping to grow a church; contribute to a church; invest your life in a church. It is about the ability to dissolve your life into a body where the whole is much more than the sum of its parts.

On this first day of Christmas, I chose to remember that I have been given ‘the church’: and it is one of- if not the single greatest- gift I have been given. If I know you personally and you have continued reading this far then you are probably a part of this wonderful gift that was given to me. If so- thank you.

The Brightest Night of the Year

If you live in North America, and most of my readers do, then tonight you will be able to experience the brightest night of the year. Tonight the moon will be several thousand miles closer to Earth than normal. In fact, it will be at its closest point all year.

The moon will be full and will appear to be its largest at moonrise. If you happen to be out later this evening turn you head up to the sky and enjoy it!

An interesting little fact about all of this is that scientists still have no idea why the Moon appears bigger at times than at others. Of course sometimes the moon is actually closer, but no where near as close to justify how large it might appear. There are just some things in God's creation that still remain elusive and a mystery.

I don't know about anyone else, but sometimes I seem to enjoy things a little more when we haven't completely figured them out. I don't think we will arrive at the point; nonetheless, pity the day when we solve all mysteries in life and the world we live in.

Earth & Sky: More information

Back In The Game

It has come... the day when BeSafe has been removed from my computer. Yeah- I CAN BLOG from home (I have told my friends that the next time I decide to be an overzealous guardian they are to shoot me.)!

So many things have happened since October... can you believe it has been that long since the Dialogue has been regular? I sure can't.

First- and foremost of course- we are very happy to be the proud recipient of a 2008 Farley. We are not necessarily proud of the particular award we garnished; however, we consider it a minor accomplishment nonetheless. Thank you, Farley- and your um, crew.

The Dialogue: 2008 Farley Winner

Second- Many of you have asked about Miss. Coleman and how she is doing in Galveston. Miss. Coleman continues on her sabbatical, now with the goal of rebuilding her home. The Dialogue, as well as some family funds (?), have allowed Miss. Coleman to rent a home in the newly built Palisade Palms on the Island. Hopefully she will be rejoining us soon.

Palisade Palms: Galveston Island

Third- and this is perhaps the most important- PICTURES! I have so many pictures of events that have happened since we have been off line that something has to be done. So, in light of recent events; the BeSafe disaster, readership numbers down, and the continued falling of gas prices, the executive board here at the Dialogue has approved a spectacular finish to this year.

That's right- one last SWEEPS WEEK for 2008 is coming soon!

So much to catch up on. Hope everyone is doing well... and it certainly is wonderful to be 'back in the game.'