Although when I was young my immediate family was not large, both of my parents came from large families and thus had ‘large’ family mindsets. This was most evident at dinner. To the Ouellette’s and the Tiffany’s, dinner is an event.
I can remember being squished around the small kitchen table eating as a family, or all sitting at the dinning room table eating and talking. I never remember my brother and I being too young for us to eat ‘as a family.’
As I got older eating as a family became harder and harder. Work schedules, school, and activities all pushed for our time and our ‘as a family’ nights became less and less. Once David and Brandon arrived, my parent’s determination to eat as a family was renewed with great vigor.
Did we always eat as a family? No; however, the times we didn’t were far and few. I have tried very hard to have dinner ‘as a family’ just about every evening since my Mom has passed. It is a gift and a tradition that I cannot afford to let go. Too many families do not eat together, and if they do it is not ‘an event.’
Everyone in our family had a job. Everyone in our family participated in someway or another. Seldom was it just Mom in the kitchen making dinner for everyone. Setting the table, ‘icing the glasses’, or even helping with one of the sides were always jobs that were given out to each member of the family. Everyone participated- then everyone ate.
As we grew older, Jason and I took on more ‘important’ jobs with dinner. Monday’s were my Dad’s night to cook and I followed on Tuesday. Wednesday was a leftover night or a night for Mom. Thursday’s went to Jason and Friday through Sunday went to back to Mom. No matter whose job it was to cook- everyone still had things to do.
Tonight I am happy and sad. My emotions are truly mixed. I don’t know if I should cry, or if I should smile. I am choosing to smile- even if a small tear slides out!
Two of my Dad’s brother’s are visiting from New York. One of my Aunts had off from work today so we planned dinner this evening. It was like I remember. We had apricot chicken, fresh yellow squash, asparagus, homemade biscuits, pesto alfredo, tea- sweet and un, and chocolate cake for dissert. Everyone had a job- and we all ate!
The meal lasted almost two hours while we sat at the table talking and laughing not even concerned about the dishes. When we finally decided it was getting time to leave we all cleaned up and put things away. In all of my attempts to eat ‘as a family’, I have sure missed eating as a family.
At some point this week gather your family together and have a dinner event. Give everyone a job…don’t just leave the work up to one person. Get everyone involved. Then sit down and enjoy each other’s company with stories, memories, and laughter. Let the dishes sit for just a while. When it’s finally over, get everyone involved in cleaning. Make a memory.
Showing posts with label memory. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memory. Show all posts
Monday, October 01, 2007
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Ouellette vs. Covey
I blame all my memory problems on Franklin Covey.
This evening as I type on my keyboard I have two notes written on the palm of my hand in black ink. Both are faded so much that you cannot tell what they originally said (and I have to think very hard to remember).
How did I get this way? How did my mind (a young mind) become so muddled and cluttered with stuff that everything I have scheduled in my life has to be recorded? Sometimes even the most basic of things.
Currently, I have been avoiding a wonderful co-worker. She is very sweet and awfully nice but she is waiting on me to return a camera that I checked out over the summer to take to a workshop. Everyday when she sees me her eyes tell the whole story. I get this look as if she is hoping against hope that I will have brought the camera back.
Everyday I try to smile (I try to avoid her if I see her before she sees me) and secretly grimace inside because I have forgotten the camera again! It has now been five weeks, thirty-five days, and eight hundred forty hours (Not counting the weekends due to the fact that I couldn’t possibly return the camera at that time anyway).
What brought all of this on?
Yesterday I left an office at the church unlocked so that I could get in and work on a program this evening for an upcoming wedding. Did I remember? Of course I didn’t…it wasn’t like it was written in my covey.
I left work quickly to get to the grocery store, picked up the boys, and hurried home to beat the rain and maximize my relaxation time. It was only in the middle of eating dinner that I happened to glance over at the empty place setting and see the unfinished product I had left myself. I could not believe how easily the task had left my mind.
So…I have come to the conclusion that it is not my fault. In case you haven’t heard, nothing is your fault. At least that is what my sixth graders think, especially the one who forgot his medication yesterday and even turned out a few ‘tears’ because he couldn’t ‘help it’.
If I had no Franklin Covey, no paper to write down notes and scheduled meetings, I would be forced to remember all of them on my own. My mind would be forced to remember or suffer the consequences (Just like the kid I sent to the office regardless of being medicated or not).
It is because of the ‘Ease of Covey’ that mind does not have to work nearly as hard as it could have in another time period. Because of this, my mind is mush. My memory is shot. My schedule remains a frantic rat race. I have joined the many addicted ‘pushers’ of society and have become a ‘covey junkie’.
This evening as I type on my keyboard I have two notes written on the palm of my hand in black ink. Both are faded so much that you cannot tell what they originally said (and I have to think very hard to remember).
How did I get this way? How did my mind (a young mind) become so muddled and cluttered with stuff that everything I have scheduled in my life has to be recorded? Sometimes even the most basic of things.
Currently, I have been avoiding a wonderful co-worker. She is very sweet and awfully nice but she is waiting on me to return a camera that I checked out over the summer to take to a workshop. Everyday when she sees me her eyes tell the whole story. I get this look as if she is hoping against hope that I will have brought the camera back.
Everyday I try to smile (I try to avoid her if I see her before she sees me) and secretly grimace inside because I have forgotten the camera again! It has now been five weeks, thirty-five days, and eight hundred forty hours (Not counting the weekends due to the fact that I couldn’t possibly return the camera at that time anyway).
What brought all of this on?
Yesterday I left an office at the church unlocked so that I could get in and work on a program this evening for an upcoming wedding. Did I remember? Of course I didn’t…it wasn’t like it was written in my covey.
I left work quickly to get to the grocery store, picked up the boys, and hurried home to beat the rain and maximize my relaxation time. It was only in the middle of eating dinner that I happened to glance over at the empty place setting and see the unfinished product I had left myself. I could not believe how easily the task had left my mind.
So…I have come to the conclusion that it is not my fault. In case you haven’t heard, nothing is your fault. At least that is what my sixth graders think, especially the one who forgot his medication yesterday and even turned out a few ‘tears’ because he couldn’t ‘help it’.
If I had no Franklin Covey, no paper to write down notes and scheduled meetings, I would be forced to remember all of them on my own. My mind would be forced to remember or suffer the consequences (Just like the kid I sent to the office regardless of being medicated or not).
It is because of the ‘Ease of Covey’ that mind does not have to work nearly as hard as it could have in another time period. Because of this, my mind is mush. My memory is shot. My schedule remains a frantic rat race. I have joined the many addicted ‘pushers’ of society and have become a ‘covey junkie’.
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